Monday, August 31, 2015

The Offer

Monday August 31, 2015

Hello.
"Hello, this is ___. Is this Rich Davidson?"

Yes it is. How are you?
"I'm doing O K. Do you have time to talk?" 

Sure, whatcha need? 
"I've been reading your blog - don't really like that term - I think it downplays what's there - I'm sorry, I digress. I like your material." 

Ok. 
 "Do you mind if I ask where do you come up with your ideas?" 

I write what I'd like to read in your magazine. 
"Oh so you know I'm with Flying?" 

Yes, I occasionally look at the management page to see who's responsible for the mess.
"The mess?" 

Yes. 
 "What about it do you believe is a mess?"  

It's a disaster. You have two maybe three acceptable writers who actually fly and the rest have been on autopilot for the past twenty years. They don't love flying and in fact, I think some of them hate it. It's kind of the same way the Republicans hate people who are actually conservative. Like that. Do you know what I'm say'n? 
 "I might. But do you think that's a fair assessment?" 

Hey you asked and to be honest I went easy. 
"So, maybe I should tell you why I'm calling." 

Alright; do you want to sponsor the fly-in? 
"No, I'm curious if you would like to write for us?" 

Your shit'n me? OK, who is this? Is that you Phil? 
"No, this is _____ from Flying and I'm serious; would you like to write for us?" 
Of course I would. Who wouldn't? But you don't want me. 
 
"No, I'm pretty sure we do." 
No. NO YOU DON'T. 

"Why is that?" 
Because I'm going to make your magazine something people want to read but you're going to lose ten percent of your readers in the process. 
"Why do you say that?" 

I thought you said you read my blog? 
 "Yes, I read it and I think it will be five." 

And that's acceptable? 
"Yes." 

Can I write about the politics of aviation, religion, and philosophy? 
 "As long as it's relevant (long hesitation), yes."  
So how exactly do we ge.... 

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK - and I am awakened from a hilarious dream. My sim partner says, "What's so funny?" as I open the door.


2 comments:

Ken Bittner said...

Now that was funny Rich! You had me all the way!
What a dream world!

Mike Dean said...

Rich? When you woke up... was it in a cold sweat? ;)